always.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Lime Sonic Bang 2006
9th and 10th Dec

yeehaw (:

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

A day out with Zakiah = total madness/fun

Monday, November 27, 2006

I dream in darkness
I sleep to die
Erase the silence
Erase my life
Our burning ashes
Blacken the day
A world of nothingness
Blow me away

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Aku ingin menjadi mimpi indah dalam tidurmu
Aku ingin menjadi sesuatu
Yang mungkin bisa kau rindu
Karena langkah merapuh tanpa dirimu
Karena hati telah letih..

Aku ingin menjadi sesuatu yang selalu bisa kau sentuh
Aku ingin kau tahu bahawaku selalu memujamu
Tanpamu sepinya waktu
Merantai hati
Bayangmu seakan-akan..

Kau seperti nyanyian dalam hatiku
Yang memanggil rinduku padamu
Seperti udara yang ku hela kau selalu ada

Hanya dirimu yang bisa
Membuatku tenang
Tanpa dirimu
Aku merasa hilang
Dan sepi..

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

After planning on going since like the last two weeks of the major examinations, we finally went. Anyway, I was really looking forward to this trip to VivoCity. About 1430hrs, my friends called and told me that there was a class discussion about the upcoming class outing at 1800hrs. They were like persuading me to come. But, I've already made plans with him. And so, I didn't attend that discussion. I just hope that they'll understand. He's still schooling while I'm already on holiday..so it's not like I get to see him that often..if you get what I mean. Sigh. Anyway, we were supposed to meet at 1600hrs. I wanted to bring my handphone but Emil needed it more than I do. While waiting, I saw Ain. She was waiting for Irya and Shila. We chatted for a while before going for their job interviews. He and I took the bus to HarbourFront. I was awestrucked by the things which I saw over there. We just perambulated aimlessly because the place was too huge. My eyes widen when I saw Toys 'R' Us. I grasped his arm and pulled him towards that store..haha. If only I had that much money..I'd buy all the toys which I fancy *rub hands with glee*. The view from the rooftop was magnificent. Kids laughing and splashing here and there. They're so adorable. From his facial expression, I could see that he's kinda excited when we got to the playground. All I could do, was smile. I know he's happy. I'm happy, when he's happy (: . There was this area where there's sort of a miniature water fountain. Some kids were having the time of their lives playing around and getting wet. Sometimes, I feel like being a kid again; carefree and just having fun. After we had our dinner at Banquet, we found the Candy Empire which Emil highly recommended me to go to. Everything there was to die for..haha. I didn't bought anything though but he surely did. We chilled at the rooftop again. The view was much more lovely during night time. Moreover, it was ohh so romantic. Took the train back home. I knew he was lethargic because he slept on my shoulder throughout the journey. A few minutes before reaching Admiralty MRT station, I told him that I'd go home by myself. However, he wanted to sent me home. Instead of walking to my block, I decided that we board the bus. I figured that if we were to walk, he will surely miss the last bus. I let the mesmerizing voice of Ahmad Dhani sing me to sleep so that, I could smile in my sleep.

Monday, November 20, 2006

In the midst of a battle of the dangerous mind..

"Kak nor..What you doing?"
"Studying"
"Ijul tenok je ehh..? Ijul tak kacau.."
"Ijul pergi luar uh..tengok t.v.."
"Kak nor..Ijul nak tenok t.v, abeh Ifan nak main game. Die tak kasi Ijul tenok t.v"
"Eh? Pegi bilang mama, sayang.."
"Okay"

Thought of getting a shuteye after mugging for chemistry. As I closed my eyes and lay my head on the table..

Emil: *Hiakdish* Oii..!! Bangon lah..blaja blaja!!
Me: Alahhh..okay okay.

Then, I moved on to physics. Studied until 0600hrs. Had a cold soothing shower and prayers. Gave sweets and Aisah a wake up call each. Got dressed to kill, for the very last paper. Met up with Aisah at the bus stand. Moving on, the last paper was quite alright. Some of the questions on physics were very familiar. I'm really glad that some of those things which sweets taught me in the library a few weeks back, actually came out. I just hope that I shaded the right option. Well, now that I've finally completed my O's, I can have a break, have a kit kat..hah.

Friday, November 17, 2006

The League of Nations

AND

Treaty of Versailles

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

I was really hoping to bump into you at the library so that I could apologise to you. I guess it was all my fault. Please forgive me. It just doesn't feel right knowing that I'm not forgiven. I want things to be like the old times. Anyway, I don't mind if you want to start all over again from square one.

I'm terribly sorry ):

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

History paper will be on the 17th, which is this coming Friday. Time is running out. I still feel that there's more that needs to be covered. I just hope that the topics that I've chosen would come out. However, I wouldn't want to get my hopes up too high though because it usually ends up in sheer misery after that.

It's the way that he makes you feel..
It's the way that he kisses you..
It's the way that he makes you fall in love..

143

Monday, November 13, 2006

My sister and I had to step in for the parent's meet at Fidzul's school. Mom had to work while dad was feeling under the weather. When we got there, Fidzul played with his classmates while my sister and I sat on those small adorable chairs at a corner. I felt like being a kid again..heh. As I observed the kids playing, I noticed something. Fidzul was playing all by himself and wasn't interacting with anyone of this classmates. Then, a girl called Jasminah came. Fidzul have always talked about her at home. It was no wonder that Fidzul fancies her because she kinda looked like Dora (the explorer) -his favourite cartoon character. Hahah. Anyway, Fidzul's teacher told my sister and I about Fidzul's character and conduct at school. I was astounded at what the teacher said. "Hafidzul is a perfectionist. When he does his work, like colouring or doing craftworks, he wants it to be perfect and not messy. He's also quiet in school. He only communicates with about one or two of his classmates and if they're absent, he would just be quiet and not speak to the rest. He's also creative and loves to draw and colour. Hafidzul tries to speak in english, even with his malay classmates. He only needs to be more interactive and expressive". My youngest brother is only four years old and he's already a perfectionist. However, he's the opposite when he's at home. I'd say he's an introvert at school and an extrovert at home.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Life is full of surprises; some are dandy whereas some aren't. Things didn't turn out the way I wanted it to be. I'm not sure of how I'm feeling at this point of time. Whether I should feel ecstatic, dolorous, disappointed or proud. Not a clue. This uncertainty is killing me..

I just wish I could spend some time unaccompanied for a while.

It's me against the World.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

After midnight, I studied for chemistry. Wanted to rest my head for a while but I ended up sleeping. When I woke up, it was 0430hrs. I continued mugging but then I figured that I needed another break. So, I plopped into the couch and dozed off. By the time I woke up, it was time for school. Tsk tsk. Even though Aisah and I got to sleep; we still feel that it wasn't enough. Anyway, I've got it all figured out..after the major killer exams, I'm going to sleep and sleep and there's no one who can stop me. Then, I get to chill and spend loads and loads of time with sweets. I get to play around with the paints and charcoals. There's more to be added to my imaginary list of things to do after the exams. I'm building castles in the air. Please someone whack me. Whack me hard enough to make me come to my senses. Well, chemistry was beyond my high expectation. Tomorrow's english paper one and two and physics.

Monday, November 06, 2006

Didn't stay overnight at my aunt's house like I usually did during the exam period because I didn't want to mess up her house with my books and notes..hah. Went to school at 0700hrs with Aisah. As I stepped into the exam hall, I could feel the butterflies fluttering in my stomach and my heart was racing. My body was quivering. Never before have I experienced this sort of reaction (quivering as I was about to sit for an exam). Even when I have settled down, my hands were still trembling. Overall, the maths paper was quite tough. For me at least. It's probably because I forgot some of the formulas..sigh. During the three hours break, Zakiah, Yufang, Aisah and I went to Woodlands Point. Actually, our motive was to go to KFC to study but then it was closed. Then, we wanted to go to the McDonald's but it was packed with students. So, we went upstairs where there were empty seats. Instead of mugging, we ended up chatting and laughing our ass off but not entirely; we did manage to do some revision. I chose the topic on Northern Ireland for the SBQ. Actually, I was really hoping that Good Governance would come out but then it didn't. Lucky for me, I still remember the facts on Northern Ireland which was my favourite topic when I was in secondary three. For the parts I've forgotten, I just bluffed my way through even though I know that I'm not so good at bluffing. Azizul is one lucky chap. He only studied on the topic about Merger and it came out. I studied about four topics but only one came out. Oh well, at least it's better than nil.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Just thought I'd make a quick post to summarise what happened during the weekend.

Saturday [In a state of ecstacy]; went to the Woodlands library with sweets. He taught me physics. Walked from Woodlands to Marsiling. Bought some drinks; quenched our thirst. Sweets sorta became my specimen for the testing of colognes and perfumes *smiles widely*. Observed some kids playing at the playground. Saw the sunset. At the jetty; admired the beautiful yet serene view where the lights made the water shimmer. Enjoyed the cool whispering breeze. Saw some fireworks across the Causeway. Sweets sent me to my aunt's house. I managed to revise for social studies for a while in my cousin's room. Grabbed some food and chatted with the people at the corridor. Continued with the revisions for a bit at home.

Sunday [In a state of nothingness]; watched the telly. Went online for a while. Studied social studies for hours. Chatted with Zakiah for about two hours on the phone. Had dinner. Continued with social studies. Off to bed to preserve my next batch of energy for maths. Sweets gave me a wake up call at midnight. Revised the formulas and did a bit of practises.

Note to self: Monday is dooms day.

Friday, November 03, 2006

I forced myself to wake up at 0930hrs. I sort of made a promise to Yufang that I'll come. Furthermore, I still need to clarify some topics and questions on maths. Yufang and I were supposed to come for the maths consultation but we got tired the day before. Only Suvitha, Yufang and me came today. At 1230hrs, I rushed home because I was supposed to meet Zakiah before going to Ariffin's house. Jalan raye lahh sey..haha. There's Ariff, Azmi, Ariffin,Amirul, Sulaime, Muhaimin, Hilma, Aini, Kaisah, Zakiah and Azizi who came later. From there, we basically covered some houses in the Marsiling area. Journey to Cikgu Fazil's house was a disaster. Headed to Sembawang and we got lost. We can't seem to find Cikgu Fazil's block. Despite the long walks, it had to be cancelled because he had somewhere to go to. Anyway, after Amirul's house..some were beginning to feel lethargic. The day ended after we've ambushed Muhaimin's house. I sent Zakiah to the taxi stand and walked home; trying hard to hold back the tears.

I kept dwelling on what went wrong.
And now I know..

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Didn't complete the final stage for my art preparatory (final design). Almost forgot to bring along my I.C and entry proof. When I was in the bus, I had to withstand the shakiness of the bus while scribbling down the definitions of each sketches. Suddenly, this unknown girl (listening to techno)who sat behind me asked me whether she could view my sketches. At first, I ignored her because I wanted to finish it pronto but then she kept calling me. So, I just passed her my sketches. Anyway, as soon as I got to school, the clan told me that I seem to look rather tensed. Everytime, I meet them..it's like that. Sigh. The art student from the express stream just had to rub it in. Making fun of my preparatory work just because I wasn't completely done with the final stage. I seriously felt like punching him at that point of time. Throughout the examination, I kept thinking about it as I can't seem to brush off that choler still. I've set my mind and wanted to prove to myself that I could finish all of it by the end of the three hours duration. With all that hostility, rage and determination..I've succeeded in proving myself that mission is not impossible.